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新年的第一天就有好消息，朋友圈里季杨杨发了一张小婴儿攥紧的拳头照片，配文：母子平安，时间是凌晨四点钟。blockquote cite=#039 class="copyright" style=#039background:#fff border-left:5px solid #4a84ce padding:20px 50px#039gtFLD5VzJtjZhTpwHnqPv97C26GU0MyAgSErmYflac/blockquotegt
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我发自心底为他们高兴，这两个都是我年少时期的好朋友，看他们结婚生子，幸福圆满，万千感慨涌到嘴边是一句：恭喜。blockquote cite=#039 class="copyright" style=#039background:#fff border-left:5px solid #4a84ce padding:20px 50px#039gtx5Bd2utEZODJvKwjkHLNUiIcWXhYG6m0g4SsPQ1e/blockquotegt
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对着手机发怔之时身旁的人醒来，我低头看她睡眼惺忪的迷糊模样，心里柔软，现在的我何尝不幸福呢，我求了那么久的愿望终于实现，我知足了。blockquote cite=#039 class="copyright" style=#039background:#fff border-left:5px solid #4a84ce padding:20px 50px#039gteLB52biZtTnzuhHCK7NPx689kQplW3vy1JDswAEY/blockquotegt
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轻轻吻了吻她的眉心，低声温柔，“陶子今晨四点生了，是个男孩。”blockquote cite=#039 class="copyright" style=#039background:#fff border-left:5px solid #4a84ce padding:20px 50px#039gtFyX3orG4cda5YtDSQRjsU92JTwZPv0MBzkfVhClA/blockquotegt
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英宝倏地睁大眼睛，直愣愣看我，我笑，亮屏给她看上面的内容，她拿过来认认真真确认，慢慢弯起嘴角，再然后湿了眼眶，指尖小心翼翼去点那个小拳头。blockquote cite=#039 class="copyright" style=#039background:#fff border-left:5px solid #4a84ce padding:20px 50px#039gtrBmiMat26sehG7LXHkWFQYOcNEypJo0nf1V4IvxP/blockquotegt
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我心疼地吻她的眼睛，“这是好事。”blockquote cite=#039 class="copyright" style=#039background:#fff border-left:5px solid #4a84ce padding:20px 50px#039gtdJsin7fgvUAwTmRX4y3tB6Vl8Kr1eWkPHx0F2bO9/blockquotegt
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她呢喃应和，“是，是好事。”blockquote cite=#039 class="copyright" style=#039background:#fff border-left:5px solid #4a84ce padding:20px 50px#039gthLkwvHC9OKDmiTegt3B87EsQU4Wru6j0nSYdZJzy/blockquotegt
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“……男孩儿……陶子和杨杨的宝宝，一定很好看，”她眼睛里有光，恋恋不舍地看照片，“……半夜生的……陶子辛苦了……”blockquote cite=#039 class="copyright" style=#039background:#fff border-left:5px solid #4a84ce padding:20px 50px#039gtqlPje0aOSNJc3isW5wmr1o2Md6nGb74QpIzxDhyY/blockquotegt
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“你想她了？”我一瞬不瞬盯着她，“我可以问问杨扬，等他们什么时候有空，我们去探望陶子和宝宝。”blockquote cite=#039 class="copyright" style=#039background:#fff border-left:5px solid #4a84ce padding:20px 50px#039gtROAkXuBLCoPT0Ud9IVY5a6FEmGzbqNci4Whg2n18/blockquotegt
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“可以吗？”她下意识转头来看我。blockquote cite=#039 class="copyright" style=#039background:#fff border-left:5px solid #4a84ce padding:20px 50px#039gtf1CIbO0nevUNrWd6FylxMQ7qzZ4RcY8Bkjho5DHV/blockquotegt
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我失笑，“当然。陶子一定很高兴见到你。你俩不是约定好你要当宝宝的干妈？不想去见见自己的干儿子？”blockquote cite=#039 class="copyright" style=#039background:#fff border-left:5px solid #4a84ce padding:20px 50px#039gtLN1Qg3v6JrPdsh5Z9lj84tyAeboBS2fkaViTOpUF/blockquotegt
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她眼睛里的光却慢慢湮息下去，摇了摇头，“……算了。”blockquote cite=#039 class="copyright" style=#039background:#fff border-left:5px solid #4a84ce padding:20px 50px#039gtmyKUjdVtk4hfM9nxeE3cRAuSoI10LZpY5CJWvlzT/blockquotegt
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她不再说话，把手机塞回我手里，翻过去拿后背对我，长发遮掩住小脸看不见情绪。blockquote cite=#039 class="copyright" style=#039background:#fff border-left:5px solid #4a84ce padding:20px 50px#039gtJxhKo0uP9q5Q7kgHpB3iZFN6M2Rzy1DmEOGjUX/blockquotegt
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我愣住，刚刚不是说得好好的，怎么心情突然低落了？blockquote cite=#039 class="copyright" style=#039background:#fff border-left:5px solid #4a84ce padding:20px 50px#039gtkCh7NbvyfsG2gair8eFd1AV5MqB3DuHXJjEKxLwc/blockquotegt
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“怎么不高兴了？是我说错什么了吗？”手搭她的肩想翻过来，她抗拒。blockquote cite=#039 class="copyright" style=#039background:#fff border-left:5px solid #4a84ce padding:20px 50px#039gt1yZEOFHN5wjP4vxBqhpXb9GJkRS2VrKlYmf03oa8/blockquotegt
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“英宝，英宝？”blockquote cite=#039 class="copyright" style=#039background:#fff border-left:5px solid #4a84ce padding:20px 50px#039gttUZzj6PKilfB1YkuEvs2nxqMhr4SaGFwIAQc385y/blockquotegt
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她依旧不语。blockquote cite=#039 class="copyright" style=#039background:#fff border-left:5px solid #4a84ce padding:20px 50px#039gtixjFHf5rw2X6AgnMYa7l8p3zKRsSOycNZDJho0m1/blockquotegt
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沉默了会儿，我妥协，决定让她自己冷静一下，“我去给你做早餐，想吃什么？面条还是炒饭？我倾向于炒饭，昨晚煲的饭没怎么动过，今早吃了它吧。”blockquote cite=#039 class="copyright" style=#039background:#fff border-left:5px solid #4a84ce padding:20px 50px#039gtxj0ewVUZIaTqg8ydsncPif52Mbz1t9JHKAYk6Gh7/blockquotegt
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我起身穿衣，床上本来安静的人突然开口：“方一凡。”blockquote cite=#039 class="copyright" style=#039background:#fff border-left:5px solid #4a84ce padding:20px 50px#039gtNKrja7bse15nZPhzkdvOiEo8RXFlVwuYGyIW2SU6/blockquotegt
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“嗯？还是你更想吃面条，那……”blockquote cite=#039 class="copyright" style=#039background:#fff border-left:5px solid #4a84ce padding:20px 50px#039gtkE03VSo7BY5vLWMNCUadnXqImbZy4iPfDzsgl8TQ/blockquotegt
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“你喜欢孩子吗？”blockquote cite=#039 class="copyright" style=#039background:#fff border-left:5px solid #4a84ce padding:20px 50px#039gtZx8S5jA1iBJybrNnuHsDoQCYXz73PvKh4fTpRekt/blockquotegt
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我没反应过来，话题怎么突然……blockquote cite=#039 class="copyright" style=#039background:#fff border-left:5px solid #4a84ce padding:20px 50px#039gtjThZ4AxOkz65lCR9WEyXJnYMoPUcBLHdeb2sgifr/blockquotegt
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“你好像很喜欢，”她没等我回答，一个人自说自话，“你给我的信里其中有一封说你想要个女儿，一个漂亮聪明的孩子，照你的条件找一个和你登对的人结婚生子，实现这一愿望并不难。虽然你现在的年龄不算大，但……”blockquote cite=#039 class="copyright" style=#039background:#fff border-left:5px solid #4a84ce padding:20px 50px#039gtiX8WnJpx57mdHSEYIVtNAjcOa3ZC29GzL1roqsQk/blockquotegt
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“英宝！”我打断她，盯着被子下单薄的身子，“你说这些话是什么意思？”blockquote cite=#039 class="copyright" style=#039background:#fff border-left:5px solid #4a84ce padding:20px 50px#039gt6pqL5CPWoJ7bSvTkh9tQ4s8X1eBrUKEVijHlZcDF/blockquotegt
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胸腔燃烧着怒火，她若无其事说着我和别人结婚生子，就像说一个无关痛痒的人，明明昨晚我们就做着能生子的事，她怎么能转身推我向别人。blockquote cite=#039 class="copyright" style=#039background:#fff border-left:5px solid #4a84ce padding:20px 50px#039gtjpGYCXLM3rPgaAl7qSeR9Nk5F1JEQ62W0uhUbfIT/blockquotegt
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我喉咙干涩，“你希望我和别人结婚生子？”blockquote cite=#039 class="copyright" style=#039background:#fff border-left:5px solid #4a84ce padding:20px 50px#039gtQjmnUJ2KNFhVgAiOsPG37HITrkaZceXpw1bo6M4W/blockquotegt
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她沉默了一会儿，“难道你想和我结婚生子吗？”blockquote cite=#039 class="copyright" style=#039background:#fff border-left:5px solid #4a84ce padding:20px 50px#039gtnrIbRuwMsXfFBe7VlqOtxLWPm3E8HSzQ6pgk4hDZ/blockquotegt
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“不然呢？”我嗤笑出声，“我现在做的一切是个笑话吗？我方一凡如果有一天要结婚有自己的孩子，那孩子的母亲只能是那个叫乔英子的女人，我结婚共度一生的人，也只能是乔英子。我这样说你明白了吗？”blockquote cite=#039 class="copyright" style=#039background:#fff border-left:5px solid #4a84ce padding:20px 50px#039gtVWxeEo6w4dsvulkJMFUfLZ9H0OQIaXr5B2DnNYg1/blockquotegt
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房间里很安静，她慢慢起身，被子滑落露出她白皙光滑的肩臂，乌黑长发掩住她一半脸，她低眼看被单，一字一句慢慢说着，“你需要我的身体，我可以给你，但我不会结婚，也不会有孩子。”blockquote cite=#039 class="copyright" style=#039background:#fff border-left:5px solid #4a84ce padding:20px 50px#039gtpjPH5vIskVE7rcKGRXilwxg9u2nhqS4eAfzBQDZ1/blockquotegt
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“结婚只是形式，孩子也只是锦上添花。就算没有那些我也没关系，有你我就满足，但我要的不仅是你的身体，还有你的心。”我目光深沉。blockquote cite=#039 class="copyright" style=#039background:#fff border-left:5px solid #4a84ce padding:20px 50px#039gtFn3ESZxUgdBY608QuLvwAHWVDbokTclatqGzjKps/blockquotegt
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她面无表情，“我早就说过，我没有心了，给不起你要的。你把大好年华浪费在我身上不值得。”blockquote cite=#039 class="copyright" style=#039background:#fff border-left:5px solid #4a84ce padding:20px 50px#039gtZFXUN3HujohYA9kspODJn06yz57qwvgcxTrQLd8t/blockquotegt
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“所以昨晚你只是为了满足我的欲望费尽心力来配合我吗？所以你觉得我和你在一起只是贪你的身子？”我苦涩又无力地笑，“乔英子，你太小看我了。”blockquote cite=#039 class="copyright" style=#039background:#fff border-left:5px solid #4a84ce padding:20px 50px#039gtUXvjRwELqgKamCDr90e3fzkuopbth6JN2FWYPQI8/blockquotegt
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说完我转身从房间里出去，我需要时间冷静，心里一遍又一遍劝诫自己，她生病了，我应该对她宽容。blockquote cite=#039 class="copyright" style=#039background:#fff border-left:5px solid #4a84ce padding:20px 50px#039gtDaYmcxwd7Ce5TVXt9nJSpj8b3l1sLPqkAB6yHEWQ/blockquotegt
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一个人去厨房，生着闷气开始做早餐，恨恨地想，生病了不起？就能这样欺负我吗！费心费力伺候你几个月不落好，就知道拿话刺我，我的心也不是铜墙铁壁做的，也会痛啊！平常说四五句话回一句就不错了，今天吧啦吧啦和我讲这么多我不爱听的屁话，不想听都拦不住，真不知道我是该哭该笑。blockquote cite=#039 class="copyright" style=#039background:#fff border-left:5px solid #4a84ce padding:20px 50px#039gtbK0BgTPjaZlNUtAIGLF98mic1JuCoSVw3k2HsErD/blockquotegt
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锅铲被我铲得唰唰响，恨不得锅底铲出个洞，一餐不做饿死你得了！blockquote cite=#039 class="copyright" style=#039background:#fff border-left:5px solid #4a84ce padding:20px 50px#039gtfTyhdrJ9e08ptPz3aMqwxUnoXKj4VIg157FHuCBE/blockquotegt
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想是这么想，身体还是老老实实煮了面炒了饭，然后踏着步子去敲她房门，“早餐做好了，出来吃。”blockquote cite=#039 class="copyright" style=#039background:#fff border-left:5px solid #4a84ce padding:20px 50px#039gtD43tNQYlUR2yLuSvkKoBiCAGbmxEeTWsgzhawFOr/blockquotegt
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回到餐桌拿起勺子，耳朵竖着听动静。blockquote cite=#039 class="copyright" style=#039background:#fff border-left:5px solid #4a84ce padding:20px 50px#039gtejXP0hJizUDsHCcm5TKyIEvOpfNdunVMSBka6GYW/blockquotegt